OIL Convictions
I don’t know what I was thinking. At first I was hesitant to go to OIL. I would be missing out on the last week of school, I’d have to use my precious vacation days, and it’s just another retreat. After Easter though, I had a change of heart and decided to go. Something in me, probably God, wanted to go and get fed. I have a lot of change coming up soon and felt like I needed to get spiritually ready.
I went to OIL not wanting to serve in any official capacity. I turned down leading a small group and audio ministry because I wanted to go and get fed. I had an idea of what I wanted to get out of this retreat and God gave me what I needed abundantly.
One of my favorite lines in a song is “Send the fire of your Spirit, return the passion of my youth” and this was one of my prayers going into the retreat. It’s easy for me to have an old hard heart. I remember the days when I was so on fire to the point of almost being crazy. Those were the days I grew the most. These days I feel like I’ve begun to settle. If I’m not being pushed hard, it’s most likely that I’m not going anywhere, merely maintaining status quo. God shook me out of this. He showed me my complacent heart and the fears that I have.
He gave me two convictions: Word and Prayer. The Bible on audio is only 70-80 hours long. An hour a day and it’s done in less than 3 months. There’s enough time for me to finish before Servants Retreat. I was scared to commit to it b/c I will also have readings for my counseling course that I’m taking. If I want to grow, I have to get the Word in me. The second conviction is to commit to prayer – MP 4x a week + all of Wed PM. This scares me even more. I’ve done this before and it’s incredibly hard for me. But I think that’s exactly what I need right now. I need a lot of prayer as I enter into a new stage of life and ministry. As they say, “No pain, no gain.”
I’m a firm believer in schedules. I constructed one to assist me in my commitments. Below is my schedule which will last until June when my class and small group starts. I’ll most likely be at County Market Tuesday and Thursday nights if anyone wants to study with me. Would anyone like to come bowling with me on Mondays for my down time?
Ready! Steady! Go!