Thanksgiving Break.
Finally I get a break. I just want a break from all this stress. I need to relax and focus. I feel like a watermelon with a hole drilled half way and someone dropped an m-80 in it and blew it into a gabillion pieces. Well, maybe not that many pieces but I feel so incredibly divided. What I thought was once so clear, has now become hazy. I’m learning so many lessons about God’s timing, surrendering my dreams, waiting on the Lord, praying that I would become who God wants me to be, life isn’t about where I go or what I do but about who I become.
Why did it take Moses 80 years to become the leader of the Israelites. Why did the Israelites wander around the desert in circles for 40 years. Why did David have to wait so many years from being annointed king do when he took the throne? Why didn’t David get to build the temple of God he so desired to build? Why did Jesus take 30 years to start his ministry? I’m so destination oriented that it doesn’t make sense. If that’s what I’m called to do, why can’t I do it now? Maybe you don’t understand. I don’t fully understand either.
One of our Pastors recently left for the mission field. He’s known he’s supposed to go for awhile but stayed here at CFC for a number of years. God opens the doors and lets him go. He hasn’t been there 6 months yet and his team leader has to leave. Because of all his spiritual training here, he becomes the spiritual leader of his missions team which he just recently joined. He’s had opportunities to talk to people and teach which he probably wouldn’t have had if he left for the field right away.
I heard it put like this. The training here is like the sharpening of a knife. You can stay your four years, get trained and be able to leave and cut with some ability. But if you stay longer and grow sharper, when you leave you’ll be like a steak knife, able to cut so much faster. In the long run, you’ll be so much more effective.
I’m so short-sighted. God, give me vision.